I just binged and threw up. Thought my tummy was gonna explode after all that huge amount of food. And now I feel like shit. Fuck this. I dont wanna live like this anymore. fuck fuck fuck fuck this.
I'm so so sorry i let you down, can't be easy trynna help me when all I do is letting you down? I don't deserve you, I don't deserve having a friend like you. Not at all. Even though you promised me you won't leave me, I don't believe you. Im so sure that you'll give up on me like everyone else and forget about me. I never should've told you about my eating disorder, never ever. I'm so sorry. And I know you're probably not reading this but just wanted to say this.
I love you. I'm so lucky to have you as a friend. Thank you for everything you've done for me, it means alot. Don't forget that.
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